WHAT MAX TAUGHT ME

By Fabienne Marneau, CH

Today, for the first time in my life, I feel totally “FREE” to Love. My heart had been broken many times before, but yesterday being with Max while transitioning to heaven, was one of the hardest things that I ever had to go through.

My baby Max, our darling companion for almost 14 years, taught me what pure love and faith in the perennity of our soul energy really are about. Yes, I could look into his eyes and see only love, pure unconditional love. Even when I left him to stay in France visiting my parents or when I spent a whole month with my father after my mother passed, he welcomed me with frenetic happiness circling around me and grabbing my harm gently guiding me to the ground to cuddle him as he loved it so much.

He always let me take away his food when I needed to add a medication or supplements, he patiently was waiting for my signal to resume eating, which was a real effort for him who loved his food as all Golden Retrievers do.

But yesterday, when he fell asleep surrounded by my son Matthieu’s love and my tender presence and caresses, I healed a deep unconscious fear that had been within me all my life. Fear of both not being loving enough and not being worthy of unconditional love. Of course, I know where this is coming from but that would be for another topic.

Max kept his eyes open even after he was gone to heaven. I was staring into those big eyes and I was no longer afraid of not being loved, understood, accepted just the way I am. I no longer need to worry about judging myself. I can love myself just like Max did love me. It does not matter how I look, or what I think. Max loved me the way I am, he recognized my voice, my touch, my smell.

He was happy with his whole family around him. Each one of us was special and unique to him. He loved to play with his brothers and his dad. They loved him and treated him in a different way, more manly and fun than my gentle protective way.

Thank you, Max, for your gifts: joy, love, dedication, protection, and for your vibrant soul. I have to remember the peace and strength that is in me now while waiting for the day that we will be reunited again. I feel you still in the house and I shall keep talking to you as I do to my mother, my friends Peter, and Barry, my parent's friends Guy, and my grandma Pagette so close to my heart.

We are Eternal and Divine, I love you Maxou, and thank you for those 14 years of happiness!

Mommy.